Bad Ass Frank – True Life Stories, Internet Radio, Comedy, Satire

On Tuesday I posted the first of my new Mythfuckers series. If you haven’t read it go check out She’s Cute But… and come back.
So now, on to the second line of bullshit that many of you women may have heard from your significant other. It’s a pretty common one and makes even less sense [...]

In recent blogs I provided information on how to, and how not to, position yourself for an opportunity to date me. As I suspected, no one could handle the pressure and bitches chances collapsed faster than the economy. Que sera, serwhogivesafuck. Someday my princess will come, it just won’t be you.
That said, many thanked me [...]

Many of you want to make sweet, sweet love to me, cuddle up for all of eternity, and be my one and only soulmate.
No.
See, I have an extensive list of deal breakers, aka ‘reasons you suck’, which I’ve politely chronicled for your review in a previous blog, Date This. Upon completion of that particular piece, [...]

Last week, many of you had the privilege of reading the heart crushing list of deal  breakers in my blog, Date This. If you haven’t read that, do so now. Otherwise this list might seem too meager in comparison and I want you to understand all of the reasons you’re not good enough for me.

Bree [...]

In last weeks blog detailing my New Year’s Resolutions, I posted the following:
“I will not date, commit to, or become involved with any girl that does not pass a thorough psychiatric evaluation, a stringent screening process, and who believes that the only thing more satisfying than not speaking at all, is not being able to speak because she’s [...]

In a discussion with my friend Joni, possessor of class, intellect, and a pair of the finest breasts I have ever had the pleasure of meeting, she wondered what breakdown of character traits constituted a potentially good dating prospect. My initial thought was “50% great tits, 50% swallows”, which seemed reasonable.

Joni doesn’t want you making [...]

And by “flowers” I mean “19 year old chicks”.

People keep giving me shit about dating younger women. (When I typed the word “women” I started laughing hysterically.) I think they’ve got the wrong idea though. It’s not as if I’m really just dating nineteen year old girls. The ladies I’ve dated that last few years have [...]

When I got divorced, I knew I needed to broaden my horizons when it came to dating and relationships. In an effort not to be narrow minded, I decided I’d meet, and involve myself with, a diverse cross-section of cultural, educational, and intellectual backgrounds. So, after I fucked those two chicks, I found the type [...]

“How many girls have you slept with?” she asks.
That’s like asking me to guess how many jelly beans are in a jar. A really big jar. A really big jar of really small jelly beans. Have you ever looked at an oil tanker and thought, “That’s quite a jar!” If so, then we’re on the [...]

Today, when you’re spending your portion of the estimated 17 billion dollars that will be wasted on Valentine’s Day gifts, ask yourself one question….
What’s in it for Bad Ass Frank?
If the answer is “nothing”, put that wallet away, pull out your cell phone and dump whoever you’re seeing, dating, hanging out with, married to, having [...]