and I know this because she is only seventeen and I check ID’s.
(Note to Bristol: Diablo Cody already has the rights to that story. )

However, I think I can safely say that this Palin won’t require me to verify that she’s of legal age:

Sarah Palin’s level of hotness has not, to the best of my knowledge, ever before been seen in the political arena. Perhaps some of you know better than I, but I’m relatively confident in my statement. If there has been another woman this sexy, she can’t have been a Republican.

I won’t believe it.

I can’t believe it.

It is simply unbelievable.

I will say that there should be more hot women in politics. Granted, I didn’t realize that women were actually allowed to run for office. Hell, I didn’t even know we were letting them vote. When exactly did this happen? That shit had to be Oprah’s idea. Fucking liberals. Next thing you know they’ll come up with some ridiculous child labor laws and totally screw my, er, our economy (hard to find good help for my sweatshop these days). As I was saying, more hot women in politics. They want to get young people out to start voting, so do something that will make them pay attention. McCain might be older than dirt, but he’s no idiot. Everything he says now sounds like Mrs. Crabtree talking to Charlie Brown (or any girl talking to me) cuz we’re all fixated on the wanna-be-VP’s skirt.

And by “we” I mean “me”.

Think about it, if Obama had chosen say, this as his running mate:

You’d overhear this conversation:

Lady: “So, do you think Obama has a chance of being our first black president?”

Dude: “He’s black?”

Lady: “Yes, he’s black. How could you not notice that?”

Dude: “Have you seen the tits on the Vice Presidential candidate?”

Lady: “You’re a pig.”

Dude: “I want to rock her vote.”

I have single handedly solved the race issue in politics. No longer will people care if you’re black, white, or Norwegian. The only thing that will matter is your stance on the issues, your character, and whether or not you have a super hot ass. Now I think we can all agree that I am, in fact, the prophet of both HOPE and CHANGE and should immediately be elected as supreme leader of all America (Speaking of change, can you break this twenty? I need some one’s.)

Bad Ass Frank for President!

Or at least a White House intern in Vice President Palin’s office. I’d totally impeach dat ass.