Bad Ass Frank – True Life Stories, Internet Radio, Comedy, Satire

Let’s cut to the chase. I am a highly sought after specimen of incredible manliness and ladies love/lust/worship me. However, I am unable to take a bride because, well, chicks are sucky. And I don’t mean the good “sucky-fucky me love you long time” kind. I just mean lame. In order for you to fully [...]

Welcome to the fifth installment of the ongoing Date This/Date That series in which I take all of your feelings of self worth, your character traits, add in your womanly virtues, and negate them one by one with soul crushing honesty. It’s not because I want you to feel bad about yourself. It’s just that [...]

I love you. And the best way for me to demonstrate this is to continuously reinforce the fact that you can’t get me, you’ll never have me, and I’m not interested. Isn’t that how the saying goes? If you love something, set it free and make sure it knows that it doesn’t live up to [...]

On Tuesday I posted the first of my new Mythfuckers series. If you haven’t read it go check out She’s Cute But… and come back.
So now, on to the second line of bullshit that many of you women may have heard from your significant other. It’s a pretty common one and makes even less sense [...]

In recent blogs I provided information on how to, and how not to, position yourself for an opportunity to date me. As I suspected, no one could handle the pressure and bitches chances collapsed faster than the economy. Que sera, serwhogivesafuck. Someday my princess will come, it just won’t be you.
That said, many thanked me [...]

My fans, audience, readers, friends…whatever you want to call em, I love them every one. Doesn’t matter to me if they’re tall, short, skinny, fat, old, young, male, or female. I don’t care if they’re Christians, Buddhists, Jews, Muslims, Wiccans, Scientologists, or the non-delusional version, Atheists. Makes no matter whether they might be White, Black, [...]

If you’ve read my previous blog, One Foot Over The Line, you understand my feelings on feet and foot fetishes. If you’ve watched the accompanying video, you know that I’ve garnered some attention from within the freaky foot fetish world. If you haven’t read that blog, or seen the video (it’s embedded in the blog), [...]

Yesterday I posted a status update, on both Myspace and Facebook, that said I was very proud of winning the Oscar for Best Status Update, and that I wanted to thank my mom for losing her virginity, god for not existing, and girls for having vaginas. Within the hour I got a bunch of shitty [...]

Many of you want to make sweet, sweet love to me, cuddle up for all of eternity, and be my one and only soulmate.
No.
See, I have an extensive list of deal breakers, aka ‘reasons you suck’, which I’ve politely chronicled for your review in a previous blog, Date This. Upon completion of that particular piece, [...]

Last week, many of you had the privilege of reading the heart crushing list of deal  breakers in my blog, Date This. If you haven’t read that, do so now. Otherwise this list might seem too meager in comparison and I want you to understand all of the reasons you’re not good enough for me.

Bree [...]